


Just a Friend, Just a Friend

by thedoobly_doo



Series: Just a Friend, Just a Friend [1]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: F/M, Gideon wasn't deaged, M/M, Roderick is still alive, The Black Fairy is a bitch
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-14
Updated: 2019-12-10
Packaged: 2020-12-16 12:07:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 12,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21035990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thedoobly_doo/pseuds/thedoobly_doo
Summary: Gideon doesn't expect anything good to come out of his trip back to the Dark Realm. Oh how wrong and how right he was.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> The majority of this was written under the influence of copious amounts of DayQuil. Enjoy.

Tension oozed from the library of the Sorcerer's Mansion. Whale paced around just outside, a nurse hot on his heels as they went through the basic medical supplies from the hospital. Snow and Charming rushed around upstairs, sorting out beds and airing out rooms for the soon-to-be-arriving children, most of whom had never seen a proper bed in their lives. Delicious smells drifted from the kitchen where Granny was hard at work, cooking meals and stocking the kitchen with whatever necessities she thought they would need the most.

Inside the library, Rumple, Emma and Regina were in a heated debate, and Gideon sat with his back against the wall, watching them anxiously. When their argument - whatever it was this time - showed no sign of letting up, he paced in front of the portal door before sinking onto one of the soft couches. Their argument seemed to buzz around in his head, and he concentrated on untying and tying his shoe for what felt like the tenth time. 

Gideon closed his eyes, trying to ignore the gnawing feeling in his stomach or the shakiness in his hands. He took a deep breath, in, out and fell into a pattern of that while his legs bounced up and down incessantly. 

He jumped as he felt weight sink onto the other cushion, along with a small hand sliding across his shoulder. Belle sat next to him, smiling softly, just the hint of worry shining in her eyes. “Are you doing okay, sweetheart?” She asked, rubbing his back softly and rhythmically. 

He was tempted to lie. To tell her he was fine, just nervous about the trip ahead. But just one look at her and he felt the truth spilling out of him. “They’re going to hate me.” Belle said nothing, only hmmed, and he continued almost against his own will. “I wasn’t good to them. I was better than Mot - the Black Fairy, but that’s not saying much.” He laughed humorlessly. “All those children - innocent people! And I just let it happen, contributed to their suffering, even! They’re never going to forgive me.”

Gideon felt himself get shaky, his voice climbing higher and the words spilling out faster, and Belle turned more fully to face him. “Breathe, Gideon. Just breathe and listen.” He nodded slowly, returning his stare to the floor as he rubbed his hands against his pants. “I know going back to the Dark Realm is going to be hard for you, but you need to take this one step at a time. Going in there and bringing all those children back isn’t going to erase the past, but you need to forgive yourself. You were just as much a victim of her abuses as they were.”

Gideon huffed. “I doubt they’ll see it that way.”

Belle smiled and petted his hair back. “Probably not for a while. But we’ll get there, one step at a time.”

Rumple came in as they talked lowly to each other, smiling at the sight of them together on the couch. Gideon looked up as he stepped closer, smiling tremulously. “We’re ready whenever you are.” His father said, sitting down next to him. Gideon took a deep breath in - this was it. This was the chance he’d wanted all his life - to save all the children from the mines and bring them home. But now that the moment was here, he found himself petrified and unable to move. 

“Are you alright, son?” Rumple asked, placing a warm hand on his shaking knee.

Gideon opened his mouth, ready to insist that he was fine. However, he knew his parents would see right through it, especially given the way his leg wouldn’t stop bouncing up and down. He wasn’t okay, but he knew that wouldn’t change with their well-meaning reassurance. “I will be.” He finally answered, returning his attention to retying his already-perfectly-tied boots. 

Before either Rumple or Belle could reply, Emma poked her head in the door. Biting back her amusement at how all three looked up to her with eerily-similar expressions, she said, “We’re ready in here.”

Gideon took a deep breath and finished retying his boot. He stood up, Belle’s hand sliding off his shoulder as he did so. All three followed Emma back into the library, and he felt his fingers start rubbing against each other as he glanced at the open portal door. Regina stood off to the side with Charming and Hook, regarding him with a cool gaze. 

Gideon took one more deep breath before turning to the door, and he could feel Charming and Killian come up behind him. "Most if not all of the children should be in the deepest level of the mines. Mot - The Black Fairy was still collecting fairy dust when she sent me here," he explained, "There will be guards, just take them out and get out the children as fast as you can."

"Where will you be?" Killian asked, a note of suspicion in his voice.

"In the upper levels, destroying the fairy dust." Gideon answered. _And anything else I can find_, he thought. "The children will be scared if they see me. It's better if they follow the two of you." He turned to his father. "How long do you think you can keep the portal open for?"

"With the three of us, we might have a half hour here, an hour tops." Rumple answered. "All three of you have walkie-talkies - I've magically enhanced them so they'll transmit to the one in here."

"I don't know how much time we'll actually have. The Black Fairy kept control over the time lapse in that realm - with her gone, it should be moving concurrently to this realm's time again. Are you ready?" Gideon finished. Charming placed a hand on the hilt of his sword and nodded. He made hesitant eye contact with his parents.

"Come back safe." Emma said after a moment, before making meaningful eye contact with him. "All of you. We'll be here on the other side."

Gideon nodded and smiled at his parents before turning back to the door. _Another deep breath._ This was it - after this he couldn't turn back no matter what memories lurked in the halls. He pulled the dagger from his belt and without another thought, sliced across the palm of his hand, wincing in pain. With a squeeze, blood dribbled out and he spread it across the top and side of the frame where it immediately began to glow a deep orange. With a glow and a rush of pain, he healed the cut and resheathed the dagger.

Suddenly, the door swung open and Gideon imagined where in the mines they were to enter in. With one last look at his parents and another deep breath, he stepped through the door, letting his body become weightless as he fell down and hit the cold stone floor. Charming and Hook followed soon after, each quickly getting up and shaking themselves off.

Gideon pointed off to the right. "The mines start that way. The left staircase goes to the mines ; the right to the cells. Make sure there's no one left behind. I'm going that way," he jerked his thumb to the left towards the large metal doors that led up to the Black Fairy's (and his old) chambers. "I'll meet you down here as soon as I can."

Without waiting for their response, he stalked towards the entrance to the upper levels, using magic to jerk the door off its hinges. As he climbed higher and higher, flicking guards out of his way with barely a thought as he went (so his entry hadn't exactly been that subtle, sue him), the memories assaulted him. The staircase he had been 'accidentally' knocked down, the rooms where he cried and starved for every mistake (real or otherwise), the cell where he had been whipped for failing his final test (and ordered via his stolen heart not to make a sound) - each one brought tears to his eyes.

He shook them off - he was here on a mission, he intended to succeed in. "Gideon?" The walkie crackled at his waist - his mother was calling him.

"We're here. Charming and Killian are downstairs as we speak and I'll join them as soon as I can." He said before shaking himself. The Black Fairy was dead and gone, and his real mother, the one who truly loved him, was waiting for him back home.

Gideon climbed his way into his mother's chambers, where her vault and the fairy dust lay waiting for him. Guards rushed towards him as he got closer and closer, but he waved them away, not particularly caring where they went or how soft their landing was. Finally the massive black doors loomed before him and he pushed his way through before he lost his nerve.

What he saw horrified him.

A massive hourglass sat in the middle of the room, all the potion tables and other furniture pushed out of the way. A stream of the fairy dust poured from the top of the glass to the bottom, pouring on someone he thought dead and gone.  _ Roderick.  _

Roderick pounded on the glass as soon as they locked eyes, yelling something, but Gideon couldn’t hear. The dust poured over his thick brown curls and covered him almost up to the knee - he didn’t have much time. Gideon rushed over, intent on getting him out. “Roderick, I’m going to get you out of there, I promise.” He yelled, but it didn’t look like the other man could hear him.

This was cruel even for the Black Fairy. If he hadn’t known all along that she was a depraved monster, his mind would have been made up right then and there. Pain still lanced through his heart as Gideon remembered watching helplessly as the Black Fairy crushed Roderick beneath her shoes. He remembered weeping silently in his cell for failing Roderick again and knowing that it was all his fault. That it turned out to all be a lie horrified him all over again.

He searched through the room, and spotted a note lying on one of the tables.

_ I knew you would return here, my darling son. I see you’ve found my little gift to you. Every time you try to break it, the valve will only open wider. Enjoy. - Mother _

With a yell, he sent the table flying across the room.  _ No. _ There had to be a way to break it. It was just glass. He would get through to Roderick if it killed him. 

He gestured to Roderick to stand back and held out a hand, magic instantly swirling from his hands and towards the glass, looking for the weak points and pounding against any it could find. The gap between the top and the bottom opened a little wider, and Roderick looked up as more dust starting pouring down.  _ Come on, come on, this has to work. _

The magic eventually stopped, shooting back to him and it filled him with dread. Roderick looked at him, resigned, and Gideon huffed. Magic couldn’t get through, but maybe brute force could.

“You really didn’t think it would be that easy, did you?”

Gideon turned to see Xavier, the Black Fairy’s most loyal and most bloodthirsty guard, casually striding down the stairs, sword drawn but casually hanging from his grip. Glee filled his eyes as he noted the situation, and Gideon summoned a sword to his hand. Xavier continued as if he didn’t notice the sword coming out. “You see, the Black Fairy knew you couldn’t resist trying to be a hero. She also knew you would rely on your magic to solve your problems. The minute you came back, that hourglass opened and began pouring the dust on your friend there. Now you get to cause his death for a second time. It really is a very clever trap.” 

“Though,” Xavier seemed to consider, his sword coming up in preparation for a fight, “it may be more fun to make him watch  _ you  _ die this time.”

Gideon reached to the walkie at his waist, but Xavier surged forward and knocked it out of his hand before he could bring it to his mouth. It skittered away, under a table, far out of reach even if Xavier’s sword hadn’t been at his throat now. “No, no, just you and me, just like old times.” Xavier stepped back, his sword lowering. “If you can manage to beat me, I’ll even let you in on a little secret. After all, we had to be able to open that hourglass somehow.”

Gideon sighed and looked back to Roderick, still hitting the glass and seemingly yelling. His friend (just a friend, just a friend) was buried almost to the hips at this point, and getting more frantic with every second. He turned back to Xavier, drawing his sword up. “How I am supposed to trust you now? I never have before.”

They circled each other cautiously, swords glinting in the candlelight. Xavier smiled, a hint of malice and glee in his eyes. “You don’t have much of a choice, do you?”

“I suppose not.”

At that, they lunged forward nearly at the same time, their blades meeting with a clang. Xavier, ever the accomplished swordsman (and much better than him, Gideon noted), quickly swiped at Gideon’s legs, which he blocked deftly. 

Round and round they went, neither scoring a hit on the other. Gideon lunged forward, and realized too late that that was exactly what Xavier was waiting for him to do. He tumbled to the ground as Xavier kicked him square in the chest, his sword clattering out of his grasp. “You always were so predictable.” Xavier said, stalking forward and stabbing his sword straight through Gideon’s hand, which had been reaching for the sword.

Gideon whimpered, a pain like fire crawling up his arm, which made Xavier shake his head. “No, no, that’s not good enough. You see, I want him to hear you  _ scream. _ ” 

Gideon kicked up, knocking Xavier’s weight off him and over his head. With barely a thought, the sword and the wound it caused vanished. Xavier crashed into the side of the hourglass, and there it was. It was small and barely noticeable, but there.  _ A crack. _

Roderick noticed it too, and Gideon smiled. The other man had always been perceptive. However, with the dust nearly up to the waist, there was little he could do about it from the inside. He tried anyway, pushing through the dust and weakly hitting where the crack had appeared. However, Gideon could tell the effort was beginning to exhaust Roderick.

Xavier, taking advantage of his distraction, got up and tackled him to the ground, his weight firmly on top of him. Gideon thrashed underneath him, but Xavier only smiled a bloody, toothy smile and decked him across the face. He felt blood fill his mouth and spat. “Is that the best you have?” 

Gideon reached for his magic, sending Xavier flying into the hourglass again, carefully aiming for the crack. The crack widened, and Roderick began to pound from the other side with renewed vigor. Xavier huffed and stood up again. “Is that the best  _ you  _ have? Magic? Pathetic.”

“What? Are you scared you’ll lose?” Gideon taunted, and Xavier’s face reddened. With a swipe of his hand, black fairy dust flew at him, covering his face and hands. It burned as it sunk into his skin, and he felt his connection to the magic deaden. Gideon swore darkly, looking at his hands then glaring at Xavier. No magic, no sword, no healing.

“Did you think the Black Fairy didn’t prepare me for every possibility?” Xavier taunted right back, stalking towards him angrily. “You see, she knows you so well. She knew you would reach for your magic when this got too tough.” Xavier kicked him in the chest again, and Gideon felt a crack as he landed roughly on the stone floor. Xavier reached him before he could get up, planting a foot on his chest and pinning him to the ground. “Now, I’m going to make you  _ scream. _ ”

With a well-placed kick, Gideon nailed Xavier in the knee, causing him to stumble but not lose his balance entirely. Xavier bore down harder, and Gideon wheezed as he felt another rib crack, but he still refused to scream. With his other foot, Xavier pinned his arm down to the ground, and smiled viciously. 

“This little piggy went to market…” With that, Xavier stomped on his fingers, breaking all of them. Gideon paled and began fighting harder, but the foot on his chest pressed down, pinning him firmly. 

“This little piggy stayed home…” There went his wrist, and Gideon felt tears spring to his eyes.

“This little piggy had roast beef…” The forearm was next, and Gideon bit his lip tightly. No matter what, he would not give this asshole the satisfaction of hearing him scream. 

“This little piggy had none…” The bone in his upper arm required more force, and Xavier stumbled just enough that Gideon was able to regain the upper hand. He brought his legs up between them and  _ shoved,  _ sending Xavier off balance and stumbling into the hourglass again. Gideon stood up, his left arm hanging limp beside him, and grinned. Xavier sneered. “What could you possibly be smiling about?”

Xavier paled as the crack deepened, this time audibly splintering up the side. He turned just in time to see Roderick give one last heave into the glass and it split open like a giant egg. Xavier leapt forward as dust spilled out from the opening in a giant wave, and Gideon choked as he felt the other man collide with him, a burning pain spreading through his stomach.

Roderick came tumbling out next, his shoulder bloody and an absolutely murderous look on his face. Xavier, furiously angry, was too busy punching Gideon across the face to even notice the other man, but Gideon did. He gestured to the dagger, lost at some point in the fight, and Roderick nodded, picking it up.

“You. Son. of. A. Bitch.” Xavier yelled, each word punctuated by another punch to anything he could reach. “You’re going to pa-”. He choked suddenly and fell off to the side, Gideon’s dagger buried in the back of his neck. Roderick stood behind him panting, his face pale.

“I’ve never killed anyone before.” Roderick stammered and Gideon laughed despite the pain coursing through his body. Roderick was alive and seemed to be alright, if a little shell-shocked. “I didn’t know it would be that simple.”

Gideon sat up slowly, feeling every wound viciously. “Are you alright? I thought … I thought you …”

Roderick laughed, though there was no humor in it. “She really was very cruel, and very clever.”  At that, Roderick looked him up and down, a smile touching his lips but concern in his eyes. “And as for if  _ I’m  _ alright, out of the two of us, I think you are the worse off.”

Gideon finally clambered to his feet, and Roderick’s face paled again. “Gideon, when did he do that?” He asked, pointing to his stomach. Gideon looked down and saw a dagger, buried in his abdomen. Instinctively, he reached for his magic with his good arm, but nothing happened.  _ Oh, right, fairy dust. _

“I don’t … I don’t know.” Gideon touched the hilt, intending on pulling it out quickly and as painlessly as possible, but even touching it sent a wave of pain through his body. He crumpled, and Roderick caught him before he could hit the floor. “We … we have to get out of here.”

“How? Between your … well, everything, and my shoulder and bad leg, we’ll have a hell of a time even getting down the stairs, much less fighting off any of the guards.” Roderick pointed out. Gideon wanted to argue, but he knew his friend was right. With no magic and two good arms between the both of them, their chances were slim to none of making it down the stairs.

“Remember when Xavier knocked that black box out of my hand?” Gideon said, as Roderick guided him to sit against the wall, propped up and panting. His ribs and arm were aching furiously, and he winced at every flinch. Roderick nodded, and Gideon gestured to the table on the far side of the room. “It went under there. I can call for help.”

Roderick looked confused, but after making sure he was as comfortable as he could be, he ran over and brought the walkie-talkie back, handing it to him while casting a suspicious glance at it. Gideon switched the channels to talk to Hook and Charming, saying, “We’re going to need some help up here.”

After a moment, the reply came back, from Hook. “What kind of help? We’re kind of busy down here.”

Gideon rolled his head across the stone, feeling every injury throbbing more angrily with every second that passed. He brought the walkie back up to his mouth, but his hand was shaking so badly he could barely keep it steady. Roderick steadied his hand and took the walkie, moving his free hand through his hair in a comforting gesture.

“How do I use this?” Roderick whispered.

“Press the button on the side, and just talk. Hook will hear you.” After making sure Roderick knew the right button, Gideon let his head fall onto Roderick’s shoulder, groaning as that jolted the dagger in his stomach, and just listened. It was no good to argue - even if he had the energy to, he certainly didn’t have any left to call for help.

“Gideon’s hurt. We need help getting out.”

“Who the devil is this?” Hook answered, and Roderick rolled his eyes. Gideon chuckled, groaning as that moved the dagger again. 

“We can meet later. We need help now.” Roderick argued, his hand returning to the rhythm of moving through Gideon’s hair as he let out another groan. The adrenaline that came with fighting was wearing off, replaced instead by exhaustion and pain. Every single part of his body ached, and tears slipped down his face. “Gideon?”

“Hmm?” Gideon murmured, letting his head fall back so he could look up. Roderick smiled sadly, running a hand through his hair again. 

He opened his mouth to say something, but clearly thought better of it. “We can talk about it later. Help is on the way.” Gideon nodded, too tired to argue or even ask what ‘it’ was. “Just try to stay awake, okay?”

“‘M doing m’ best.” Gideon said. Roderick talked to him, and even though he didn’t catch the exact words, the warm tone of his friend’s voice kept him clinging to consciousness. After what felt like hours but in reality was likely only minutes, he heard people come rushing in, along with cries of surprise. Roderick tensed next to him, and Gideon opened his eyes enough to see Hook and Charming coming down the stairs, their eyes wide at the blood and fairy dust surrounding them.

“Can’t you heal yourself, lad?” Hook said, closer than he had been before. Gideon shook his head.

“Dust. In my face. No magic.” He slurred, before letting his eyes shut again, barely clinging to awareness. Roderick still felt tense next to him, and Gideon realized that he had no idea if Hook and Charming were friend or foe. “Roderick, Hook and Charming. Charming, Hook, Roderick. They’re friends.”

“What do you need us to do?” Charming asked.

“Ummm,” Roderick stood up and Gideon stared up at him as he explained. A feeling he couldn’t begin to identify filled him as he watched Roderick take charge. “Hook, you go ahead and keep any guards away. Charming, here, we’re going to tie this arm to his body…” Gideon bit back a cry as strips of fabric wrapped around his torso and pulled  _ tight _ , binding his broken arm to his body. Charming might have apologized, but Gideon didn’t hear anything past his own moans. 

“...I’m going to take this side, so his weight doesn’t lean on my bad shoulder. You won’t be able to wrap his arm around your shoulder, so just keep him up anyway you can. And keep the dagger in his stomach as level as you can. Where are we going?”

“Down to the entrance to the mines. There’s a portal there to the Land without Magic, where we all came from.” Charming said. “The rest of the children are all through now, and we just have to get Gideon through. We don’t have much time.”

“Alright,” Roderick nodded, and if he was afraid of what was ahead, he didn’t show it. Gideon couldn’t begin to imagine the strength and courage this was all taking, and he felt his heart beat harder in his chest as Roderick looked down at him, his eyes softening. Roderick crouched beside him, running a calloused hand through his hair and giving his chin a tiny shake. “We’re going to be as gentle as we can, but this is going to hurt, and we can’t stop.”

Gideon nodded, bracing himself for the pain that was about to come. Roderick carefully wrapped his right arm around his shoulder and he felt Charming’s arm wrap around his waist. He bit back another cry of pain as they pulled him up, and he felt his stomach turn and threaten to eject its contents. However, like Roderick said, they couldn’t stop.

Hook waved them forward, and they descended the stairs as quickly as they could. Gideon bit back screams with every step they took, and he could hear Roderick talking to him fast and low. He listened harder. “I know it hurts, you’re being so brave, just stay awake. We’re almost there.”

The last thing he remembered was stumbling through the portal door and Roderick’s piercing blue eyes on his as his eyes slid shut.

* * *

Roderick limped through the too-large, too-bright, weird-smelling building with one mission in mind - to find Gideon. He knew they were brought into this strange place together, before the women (he had heard someone call them nurses) had to physically drag him away from Gideon. The last sight he had seen was Gideon, barely conscious, being wheeled down another hallway before the door swung closed, taking him out of Roderick's sight. With the way the 'nurses' had poked and prodded at him, wrenching his injured shoulder in the process of wrapping it, he had no doubt they were doing worse to his friend (just a friend, just a friend).

He avoided the strange silver doors - after a few minutes watching from a shadowy corner, all he saw was people going in and never coming back out. In his experience, that meant a beating or worse, and he could only hope that Gideon hadn't disappeared behind one of those.

As he wandered, his mind ran on a constant loop of Gideon, Gideon, Gideon. The image he had of his friend lying on the mine floor as Xavier broke every bone in his arm almost made him bend over and retch. He had to keep going, Gideon wasn't in any state to take any more beatings. Roderick would take them for him if he had to, but he had to find his friend first.

Other prisoners, some much older than he ever thought people could be, looked at him curiously as he limped along. A couple of 'nurses' - he didn't know, but they were dressed the same as the women who had been with him - tried to stop him, but he shrugged off their hands. He had to find Gideon, and for all he knew, these people had left him somewhere to be tortured or just left him to die alone.

He had just passed a large open space (perhaps more quickly than he needed to - too exposed) when he heard a woman calling after him. Roderick wasn't even sure why he stopped until he realized - she knew his  _ name. _

"Ma'am." He turned and answered her, carefully keeping his eyes down. Even if he was in a rush and anxious in a way that bordered on panic, disrespect wasn't excusable. His shoulder, aching ferociously now, reminded him well enough of that.

Even with his eyes cast down, he could see she was short, even shorter than him and certainly much shorter than Gideon, though she wore strange shoes that made her seem taller. "Roderick, that's your name right?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Gideon has talked about you before." She seemed friendly, but he couldn't be sure. But if Gideon had trusted her, he would probably be safe to do so as well. "Are you looking for him?"

"Yes, ma'am. I would appreciate it if you could tell me where he went." This woman was friendly so far, so he took a risk and made hesitant eye contact with her. Her blue eyes sparkled as he looked, and she smiled sweetly.

"I'm Gideon's mother. You can call me Belle, and you're welcome to sit with us while we wait for Dr. Whale." At that, she tugged on his elbow, pulling him into the open space and over to a man waiting at one end. He cast a look over his shoulder, back towards the nurse, but the woman behind the desk didn't seem concerned, so he assumed it was alright.

"Ma'am, I  _ need _ to find Gideon." He protested, and she fell silent. He immediately cast his eyes back down to the floor and tried to walk away, but Belle's hand around his elbow stopped him. Roderick braced himself - he knew what came next. Maybe if he was lucky, one of them would take pity on him and it would just be a small beating. "I - I'm sorry, I shouldn't have been so disrespectful, it won't happen again."

"Oh, no, sweetheart." Belle rushed to say. "You're not in any trouble. We were just trying to figure something out." Relief flooded him, and Roderick sank into a nearby chair, trying and failing to keep his leg from bouncing up and down. He noticed Belle and a man with short gray hair exchange a humored look before the man got up and sat next to him.

"I know this world is new to you. Belle, would you run down to the cafeteria please?" The man handed Belle a green slip of paper and with a loaded look between the pair and a smile for him, she was gone. "You can call me Mr. Gold. I'm Gideon's father. You're Roderick, right?"

"Yes, sir."

To his surprise, Mr. Gold laughed. "You don't have to call me sir."

"Yes, si - Mr. Gold." Being allowed to refer to anyone above him as anything other than 'sir' or 'ma'am' was new, and it made him feel even more nervous. These were strange people, indeed. "Do you know where Gideon went? I'd really like to find him, if I could."

"He's back being tended to, just like you were when you first got here." Mr. Gold said, and horror filled Roderick down to the depths of his soul. 'Tended to' could mean all manner of things, and images of what could possibly be happening to his friend filled his mind until he felt himself start breathing harder. He stood, pacing around until he could get himself back under control. These people, Gideon's parents or no, would surely use it against him if they knew how much he cared for Gideon. "Roderick, it's alright, you can sit down."

"I can't, I can't." He said, the words spilling out of him before he could bite them back. "He could be being hurt more, and I don't think he can take much more. I have to find him, I have to protect him!" A nurse approached, a stern and serious look on her face and he shied away from her hands.

"He'll be alright, this is all just new." Mr. Gold addressed the nurse, and she walked away after a moment too long, watching him cautiously. "Roderick, no one's going to hurt him here, and I promise I would bring this building down to find him if I thought anyone would even try."

Roderick was hit by how sincere Mr. Gold sounded, the ferocity in his gaze at even the thought that someone would be hurting his son. He sank into a chair, directly across from Mr. Gold, and mustered up the courage to look him dead in the eye. "You would?"

"Of course." He answered before leaning forward, his elbows on his knees - a surprisingly casual posture. "This place is called a hospital. It's where, if you're sick or injured, people called doctors help you get better. They have Gideon now, trying to repair where the dagger went through his stomach. We're just waiting here to see him."

"There are people who  _ help _ when you're injured?" What a novel concept. In the mines, you either got better or you were never seen alive again - he had lost many a friend to injuries or illness before.

Mr. Gold's surprise at his question shifted into a sadness that clung to him like a shroud. He sighed. "Yes, there are people who help the sick and injured. I know there's a lot to learn about this world, but we'll all do our best to keep you and the other children safe. We won't let you all be hurt anymore."

Roderick felt his throat tighten, and he looked away, swallowing thickly. To his embarrassment, tears came to his eyes, and he ducked his head to hide them. He tried to wipe his eyes subtly and thankfully the other man didn't comment, only looking up and smiling as Belle came back in the room. She handed him a small cup before turning her gaze his way.

"Are you hungry?" She asked, and he looked up, surprised. They were going to  _ feed _ him, too?

"Y-yes, ma'am."

Her eyes softened, and he smiled despite himself. Roderick didn't know how she could possibly care about a vermin like him, but she seemed genuine and he found he trusted her without knowing when he had decided he could. "I figured as much. From what little Gideon has said about his time there, I doubt you've eaten for some time." She sat water in a clear container and two slices of bread with some kind of yellow substance between them in front of him. "Eat. This should be easy on your stomach. I know it's not much, but the cafeteria is closed for the night, so the vending machine will have to do."

He thought he heard Mr. Gold complain about 'vending machine coffee' but he wasn't really listening. Roderick reached for the food, watching the pair in front of him hesitantly. They seemed to be kind and caring, but he knew all too well that kindness was usually a ruse and there was still a chance this could all be ripped out from under him. However, neither of them made a move towards him - in fact, they were too busy looking at each other to even notice him - and he tucked into the meal before either could change their mind and take it away from him.

“So,” Belle asked, and Roderick looked up, his water halfway to his mouth. “What exactly happened in there?”

Roderick set the container down, leaning forward with his elbows on his knees. “The Black Fairy set up a trap for Gideon. He was trying to get me out of it when one of the Black Fairy’s guards attacked him and threw some of the fairy dust at him, and it took away his magic. Xavier - the guard - stomped on Gideon’s arm but Gideon was able to kick Xavier into my prison and break it open. I ... I stabbed him in the neck before he could beat Gideon up anymore.”

Belle hmmed and after a moment said, “What kind of prison were you in that he could just break it open?”

“...An hourglass.” Roderick said, and their horror-stricken faces said more than he ever could. The memories came flooding back now - the Black Fairy coming crowing into the vault after tricking Gideon into thinking he was dead, sitting in there day after day with barely any food or water, Xavier taunting him with his imminent death via choking on fairy dust. It was all so much to take, and he felt himself beginning to shake. “Your son saved my life ; I can’t thank him enough.”

“It sounds like you saved his too.” Mr. Gold said, and Roderick looked away. “He talked about you the most, you know. He didn’t tell us much about the Dark Realm or his time there, but he talked quite a bit about you. About how you helped him see the good in himself and gave him the courage to stand up to her. He said … without you, he didn’t think he would have ever thought he could be a hero.”

Roderick felt his face heat. He had no idea Gideon thought that highly of him, and knowing that his friend (just a friend,  _ just a friend _ ) had talked about him so made his heart soar. He smiled and said, “I wasn’t aware that I had such an impact, but I’m not sorry to hear it.”

A slight cough turned their attention away from the topic at hand, instead shifting it to a small man in a white coat with blindingly-blonde hair. Belle stood immediately. “Dr. Whale. Is he alright?”

“He’s going to be just fine.” This Dr. Whale replied, and Belle sunk back into her chair, where Mr. Gold wrapped an arm around her shoulder comfortingly. Dr. Whale eyed him curiously, before saying, “I’m sorry, this is for family only.”

“He’s staying. He’s as good as family.” Mr. Gold said, and Roderick looked over, surprised.  _ Family?  _ These people barely knew him, and they already considered him  _ family _ ? “He saved my son’s life. We want him here, Whale.”

If Whale had any protests, he didn’t voice them, only looked at him for a second too long before continuing. “It was touch and go for a little bit - the dagger pierced two sections of his colon, so we had to repair it as we went. His arm is broken in three places, and all four of his fingers are broken as well, so his arm is going to be in a cast and a sling for a while, and he’ll need physical therapy afterwards.” Whale looked at Roderick. “Charming told me what you did to keep it steady - you did a good job keeping the bones aligned. Without that, he might have needed more surgery to fix it.”

Roderick blushed, not used to being praised for … well, anything.

“When can we see him?” Belle asked.

Whale smiled softly. “Gideon had a bad reaction to the anesthetic.” He held up a hand as Mr. Gold opened his mouth, ready to ask what exactly had happened. “Sorry, that was a bad choice of words. It was an … unusual reaction. He started to wake up in the middle of surgery, and we had to give him a little more than usual. He was starting to come around when I left to come down here, but he’s a little … loopy right now. However, I’m sure he’ll be happy to see you.”

“Thank you, Whale.” Mr. Gold said, standing with Belle.

“I have another round before the night is over, so I’ll be in to explain this all to Gideon before I leave. And,” At that, he turned to Roderick. “I’d like to take a look at your shoulder as well before I go.”

“Yes, sir.” Roderick said, watching silently as Whale left and Belle and Mr. Gold gathered their things together. They began to walk away before Belle turned back.

“Are you coming?”

Roderick was surprised. Despite how kind they were to him, he fully expected that they would want to be alone with their son. Her eyes softened, understanding in her eyes. “You can come with us, you know.” Belle said. “I’m sure he’ll be happy to see you’re okay too.”

He stood and followed along after them, eager to see with his own eyes that Gideon was alright. Despite Mr. Gold’s assertions that this place was safe, he still wasn’t fully sure, and it felt like the knots in his stomach wouldn’t settle until he saw Gideon was safe with his own eyes. After a while, he also became glad they seemed to know where they were going - this place was more of a maze then the mines were.

They all walked into the room to see Gideon, illuminated by one light over the bed, with tears streaming freely down his face and eyes tightly shut. Belle rushed forward, pushing past him and Mr. Gold, and went to her son. “Gideon, what’s wrong?”

“Is dark and I can’t find my toes.” He slurred after a moment, and Roderick heard Mr. Gold ask the doctor exactly how much anesthetic they had given his son. He could see Belle’s shoulders shaking and apparently so did Gideon because he cried harder. “And now you’re laughing at me!”

Roderick couldn’t help it - he chuckled. Gideon looked over to him, his brown eyes wide and wet. “Why is everyone laughing at me?” He asked plaintively, looking back to Belle, who was running her hand through his hair comfortingly. “I’m just looking for my toes!”

Mr. Gold lifted the blanket at the end of the bed, saying, “It’s fine, your toes are still all here, Gideon.”

“Oh.” Gideon looked down to his feet, wiggling them around under the blanket and watching them with wide eyes. He inspected everything carefully, from the sheet that covered the bandages over his stomach to the contraption that held his arm straight, his eyes wide. “Where am I?”

“You’re in the hospital, sweetheart.” Belle said, and ran her hand through his hair, her face pinched at the sight of the dark bruising on his face. Roderick stepped more fully into the room, too aware of Gideon’s eyes on him as he sat cautiously in a chair in the corner. “Do you remember what happened?”

Gideon looked up, eyes moving back and forth. “Xavier. There was some fairy dust that got in my face. A sword fight. I think he stomped on my arm? I got here and they gave me some an - ana - sleepy juice.” Belle laughed again, and Roderick relaxed a little bit. Gideon looked over at him. “You killed him.”

Roderick nodded, pushing away the flash of guilt. Xavier deserved it, he knew. If he hadn’t stabbed him, Roderick knew he would have killed Gideon and then him as well, but still the guilt lingered. “I did.”

Gideon’s expression softened, and Roderick felt his heart beat harder, his face heating. “You saved my life.”

“We saved each other, more like.” Roderick said, and Gideon smiled a little too widely. “How do you feel?”

“That’s just what I was about to ask.” Whale stepped in, a brown board in his hands with some papers clipped to it. “How are you feeling?”

Gideon laid his head back, sighing deeply. “I feel… cloudy.” When that got him nothing but confused looks, he explained. “Like when the clouds are close to the ground. I can’t remember the word right now, but you can’t see in it very well. It’s … it’s…”

“Foggy.” Gold supplied, and Gideon nodded sagely.

“Foggy. I feel foggy.” Gideon said, and Whale laughed.

“You’re still coming off the anesthetic, and you’re on a lot of pain medication. You’re going to feel that way for a little bit.” Whale came closer, lifting the blanket to check the bandages and feeling along Gideon’s extended arm. Belle moved out of his way, instead standing behind Roderick’s shoulder. Seemingly satisfied for the moment, Whale stepped back.

“You’re going to be here for a couple of days, Gideon.” Whale said, and Gideon lifted his head, a protest on his lips. “You have stitches in your stomach, three broken bones in your arm, two broken ribs, four broken fingers, and a broken nose and cheekbone. And you seemingly got off pretty lucky.” 

“I want to go home.” Gideon said, near whining, and Roderick shook his head. Belle placed her hand on his shoulder, a slight smile on her face.

“He doesn’t like to be away from home for long.” She whispered, and Roderick smiled. He knew his friend had longed for his parents since he was a small child, and it must be unbearable to be separated from them by something he could normally heal with barely a thought. 

“We’ll send you home once we can get your arm in a cast and your stomach starts healing.” Whale said. “They’re already starting to heal, so you shouldn’t be here too long.” Gideon laid his head back, his eyes sliding shut. His chest heaved, and Roderick smiled at the look of some sort of peace falling over his friend’s face.

“I’m tired.” He murmured, eyes cracking open. “Do I have to eat ‘fore I sleep again?”

“You should. I’ll make sure you get something.” Whale said, and Gideon sighed, letting his head loll back. “Roderick, you need to come with me so I can check your shoulder out.”

Gideon lifted his head. “Wait, don’t take him ‘way again. Can’t ‘e just stay here?” He pleaded, and Roderick felt his face heat as Mr. Gold, Belle, and Dr. Whale looked to him. “I’d really like ‘im to stay. I like ‘im and ‘m gotta protect ‘im.”

“I’ll be back, I promise.” Roderick said, and Gideon stared at him a few seconds too long, his gaze flicking all over his face as if he was trying to memorize exactly what he looked like. With a jolt, Roderick realized that was  _ exactly  _ what Gideon was doing. Memorizing what he looked like now in case he didn’t come back again.

“He’ll be just down the hall, Gid.” Belle said, pulling up a chair beside her son. Gideon’s gaze flicked to her, but Belle watched Roderick with something that seemed like understanding. “I’ll go with him, if you want.” Her gaze slid away from him and back to her son.

Roderick flushed as he realized not only was Belle aware of his feelings for Gideon, it appeared that Mr. Gold was as well. The other man watched him with a similar look to Belle’s, and Roderick looked down to the floor. Gideon sighed from the bed, calling all their attention back to him.

Gideon looked at him, his brown eyes piercing his. “Just down the hall?” He asked, and Roderick smiled, his hands itching to move through Gideon’s ridiculously-soft hair. However, with his parents and the doctor still in the room, that would be more vulnerability then he was willing to show to anyone but Gideon.

“Just down the hall.”


	2. Just A Sleepless Night

Gideon jerked awake as the clock struck 3 AM down the hall, his heart pounding in his chest. He took a deep breath, trying to chase away the phantom feeling of chains pinning him down and burning stripes on his back.  _ In, two three four, hold, two three four, out, two three four. _ He ran through the exercise over and over in his mind, but still he could hear the echoes of Roderick screaming for him - sleep would not find him again tonight, it seemed.

He wanted to roll over and at least try to go back to sleep - despite his mind racing, his body was still feeling the effects of the injuries and the pain medication he was on. However, his stupid cast was a damper on those plans, and his stomach ached fiercely. And he knew inherently that even if he could get comfortable again, his mind would keep him up until his anxiety faded away.

He sighed and closed his eyes, resting his head back against the pillow. By all accounts, he should be feeling happy right now, or at least close to it. Dr. Whale had sent him home from the hospital yesterday, and even having to sleep downstairs alone wasn't too much of a damper (apparently climbing stairs with stitches in his stomach, one good arm, and a black eye was an absolute  _ no _ ). He listened to the house settle, and even imagined he could hear his parents and Roderick sleeping upstairs.

Gideon felt his stomach twist (though thankfully in a pleasant way, unusually) when he thought of Roderick. Months and months of depression and grief, so much time blaming and hating himself for causing his friend's (just a friend, just a friend) death, and it had all been a  _ lie _ . The anxiety roiled in his stomach, bubbling over into anger and pain and a dozen other emotions he couldn't begin to identify.

He pressed his hand to his eyes.  _ It’s over, it’s over, it’s over, _ he recited. Roderick was safe, relatively unharmed, and asleep upstairs. His parents had welcomed him with open arms, and Roderick, though hesitant, had accepted. He had settled in nicely, it seemed, though Gideon wished he could have been there when Roderick had settled in. Instead he had been lying in a hospital bed, floating in and out of consciousness.

Gideon sighed and shook his head. Sleep wasn't coming and definitely wasn't going to if he kept letting his mind wander wherever it wanted. He propped himself up gently, being careful not to twist too much, and pulled his laptop (a gift from Henry and Emma for his birthday) closer, booting up the Netflix thing Henry had shown him. He slipped his headphones in - low volume or not, he didn't want to wake anyone.

He turned on some baking show that Henry had recommended to him, trying to get into the fun competition. Gideon sighed, shifting slightly onto his right side and propping his head up on his arm. He had been watching for only 15 minutes when he vaguely heard a knock on his bedroom door.

Gideon looked up and did a double take as he saw Roderick standing awkwardly right outside the door, a slight smile crossing his face as they made eye contact. He quickly paused the show, slipping his earphones out and letting them fall to his chest. "Hey." He said dumbly, unable to think of anything else to say. 

"Hey." Roderick answered, leaning against the doorframe. "I came down for some water and saw the light. What are you doing up?"

Gideon looked away, back towards his screen. "Nightmare." He explained. "Couldn't get back to sleep." Neither of them were strangers to nightmares - in fact, they had started talking so long ago as children because one or the other of them had woken up screaming. But something about this situation - the darkness, the early hour, the quiet, the fact that they were both grown now, he couldn't tell - made it feel so much ...  _ more _ . "What about you?"

"Nightmare." Roderick said, and Gideon reached over, flicking on the lamp. They both squinted in the sudden light. Gideon shifted over in bed, pushing his laptop to the side. Still Roderick hovered in the doorway, and Gideon looked towards him shyly.

"You can sit down, if you want to." Gideon offered before he could overthink it. Roderick hovered in the doorway for another few moments before he crossed the threshold, sitting down on the very edge of the bed, his hands twisting in the blanket. Roderick didn't look at him, and his expression was shuttered and pale. Gideon thought maybe he knew what was going on, and whispered, "You didn't just come down for water, did you?"

Roderick's head shot up, his eyes wide. After a moment, he relaxed, a trembling smile crossing his face. "No. I just ... I needed to see if you were okay."

Gideon ducked his head, smiling softly. His chest felt warm and tight. Roderick continued, "I couldn't get out of that hourglass, in my nightmare, I mean. I had to watch as Xavier ..." He stopped, sounding choked and his head dropped. Roderick's fingers twisted more in the blanket, and Gideon felt the urge to reach forward and take his hand in his own. "I used to resent you, you know. That night, getting whipped, knowing you had promised not ten minutes ago to protect me. I was so _ angry  _ for so long."

Gideon watched as Roderick's shoulders shook a little and wanted so badly to reach for him, hold him, comfort him. However, given what Roderick had just said, he had the feeling that would be unwelcome. He simply had to watch and feel the guilt and pain wash over him again. He clenched his jaw as tears sprung to his eyes. "I'm sorry, Roderick, I truly am." He choked out.

Roderick looked up, fresh tear tracks on his face. "I don't want you to apologize." He finally muttered, and Gideon looked away. "I don't ... we were children. It wasn't your fault."

Gideon scoffed. "It was. I should have done something, I knew even then she wouldn't have hurt me nearly as badly."

Roderick shook his head. "That's not my point anyway. My nightmare, how much it hurt to see you ... dying.” He took a deep breath, and when he spoke again, it was in a whisper. "You had to live that way for years. There and here."

Gideon felt a tear slip down his face, quickly followed by another. He passed his hand over his face, wincing as he pressed a little too hard on the bruises. "I deserved it." He muttered.

Roderick jerked his head up, meeting his eyes with a fierce glare. "You didn't. No one deserves that."

Gideon chuckled humorlessly. "You really believe that? After everything I let happen to all of you?" He looked away, and his voice got softer. "After everything I let happen to you?"

Roderick moved further up the bed, close enough that their hands almost touched. Gideon could feel the narrowing distance between them like a crackle of electricity in the air. With what appeared to be a deep breath, Roderick leaned closer, his hands cupping either side of his face. Gideon froze without meaning to, captivated by the warmth of Roderick's fingers and his blue eyes holding his unwaveringly. "I don't blame you." He stated, each word falling between them heavily.

Gideon looked away, unable to look at him without feeling like his stomach was about to leap into his throat. "Okay." He wouldn't believe that he had in any way earned Roderick's forgiveness, but the other man gave it freely regardless. Roderick smiled softly at that, his fingers ghosting over his skin as he leaned back.

"Anyway, I just needed to see if you were alright." Roderick said, obviously making to get up and go back to his own bedroom. "I should let you get some sleep." He stood at that, but Gideon reached out and caught his wrist. The other man froze, looking back at him with confusion.

"I ... umm, you can stay if you want." Gideon stammered. "I wasn't really sleeping anyway," he gestured to the laptop, half-closed and still alight, "I mean, if you're not too tired, I probably should have thought of that..."

"I'd like that." Roderick interjected. With a smile, Gideon shifted over and Roderick climbed in beside him, rubbing his leg with a wince. He spotted Gideon watching him and said, "It never really healed right after." He explained softly, before meeting his eyes with a stern look. "And don't you dare apologize."

"I wasn't going to." Gideon said with a small laugh, and Roderick raised an eyebrow, skeptical. "Ok, maybe I was, but I won't."

"Alright." Roderick said slowly before settling back down. Their hands were only centimeters apart under the blanket, and Gideon knew if he even moved a hair to the right their fingers would be touching. He could feel the tension in the air, ready to snap at any moment. To distact himself from doing something stupid and most likely unwelcome, he pulled his laptop closer, placing it half on his lap and half on Roderick's. Roderick gave it a curious look before saying, "What about you? What was your nightmare about?"

He looked over from turning off the lamp, feeling his stomach leap into his throat. Roderick watched him, his skin tinted from the light from the laptop screen and his blue eyes filled with concern. He was there, alive,  _ breathing _ , and Gideon felt his heart beat a little harder. He couldn't believe he had gotten so lucky to have Roderick there, so close that he could feel his warmth soaking into his skin. The cynical part of him was still convinced this had to be a dream and he was going to wake up alone.

Gideon smiled softly, his fingers itching to take Roderick's hand in his own or cup his warm cheek. "It doesn't matter anymore." He whispered, and Roderick pursed his lips but didn't argue.

They settled next to each other at that, their shoulders only inches apart. With some whispered explanation of the laptop, the Netflix thing, and how the headphones worked to the best of his knowledge, Roderick's attention became focused on the show, laughing softly at some of the baking mishaps on the screen. Too soon, Gideon felt himself drifting off again, and barely felt as Roderick's fingers touched his, their pinkies locking together.

* * *

Belle crept down the stairs at 9 AM, Rumple right behind her. Roderick's door had been closed when they passed it, and she assumed Gideon was still asleep as well. If they were both sleeping, she didn't want to wake them by thumping down the stairs. 

"It's not like Gideon to sleep this late." Rumple whispered, and she rolled her eyes in good humor.

"He's injured and on medication, he probably needs the sleep." She reminded him, and he laughed softly.

"Probably hungry too." Rumple said, kissing her softly once they had reached the bottom of the stairs. She looped her arms around his neck, bouncing up onto her tiptoes so she could kiss him more deeply. These quiet moments were few and far between now - with Gideon in the house with an uncanny talent for interrupting them, these quiet mornings were a treat. 

Rumple pressed her against the wall, his tongue sliding into her mouth. Belle arched her back, pressing as close to him as humanly possible. His hands roamed up and down her back before sliding under her rear, pulling her somehow even closer. Their lips separated with a soft 'pop', and she strongly reconsidered having come downstairs at all. 

"I'll start getting breakfast together." He said softly. "You go check on Gideon."

She kissed him again before pulling away, walking down the hallway towards the room where Gideon would sleep until he was cleared to go up stairs again. Belle peeked her head in the bedroom, prepared to see Gideon sleeping soundly or maybe starting to come around. 

Instead, she saw him sleeping propped up, his head leaning ever so slightly to the side and resting on top of Roderick's. Roderick's head was nestled against Gideon's shoulder, with their hands linked together over the blanket. Belle smiled, creeping in and sliding the laptop off Gideon's lap, the headphones sliding out of each of their ears.

Gideon stirred as she slid the laptop onto the nightstand. He cracked his eyes open before groaning, obviously in pain. She smiled softly, pushing his hair back from his face. He glanced at her with a sleepy smile before looking to Roderick, his smile getting even softer. "It's 9 AM. We're getting breakfast together now." She explained.

"Mmm." He hummed, letting his head fall back to Roderick's. "I'm tired."

"You should eat something." Roderick murmured, his eyes still closed. Gideon looked to him then, his face soft. 

"How long have you been awake?" He whispered, and Belle watched from the door. Neither of them seemed to notice she was even there, and she felt her heart clench at the soft, sleepy look on both of their faces. Gideon looked more content then she had ever seen him, even while being obviously in pain. 

"A few minutes." Roderick said, sleepily stretching and moving his injured shoulder with a wince. He looked at her, eyes widening. "Sorry, we were just..."

Belle held her hands up, stopping his explanation before he could apologize for making her son happy with something so simple. "It's okay, really. Just come out when you're ready. Breakfast is cooking now."

She heard them playfully teasing each other as she walked back down the hall. Rumple looked up from stirring eggs in a deep bowl, asking, “Is he alright?”

They both smiled as they heard Gideon start laughing, loud and full, and Belle said, “I think he’s just fine.”


	3. Just a Kiss

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gideon and Roderick finally talk about 'it'.

Gideon stepped out onto the back porch, yawning widely. He held two cups of tea precariously in his good hand. Roderick sat on the end of the porch, his bare feet in the dewy grass. He didn’t look over as Gideon clumsily plopped down beside him, only staring ahead at the sun beginning to peek its head up on the horizon.

Roderick took the cup of tea Gideon offered, but said nothing. He held it between his hands, the steam curling up over his lips and nose. Gideon wanted to break the heavy silence, but he wasn’t sure what to say. He sipped his tea and muttered, “You’d think after years of sleeping alone, I’d be used to it, but I still woke up the minute you got out of bed. I figured as long as I was up, tea would be nice.”

Roderick, miracle that he was, laughed at that. Gideon slowly pulled the blanket from around his shoulders and extended it to wrap around Roderick’s shoulder too. Roderick still didn’t look at him, but he pulled it closer, saying, “You shouldn’t have been carrying this much weight.”

“My stomach didn’t hurt at all. And Dr. Whale said I can start trying to lift things now that the stitches are out.” Gideon said, watching Roderick’s face carefully.

“I’m sure he didn’t mean this much weight. This comforter is quite heavy.” Roderick scolded, and Gideon only hummed, sipping his tea. He watched Roderick, who in all this time still hadn’t made eye contact with him, and he saw Roderick’s lips curl up. “I can see you watching me.”

“Sorry.” Gideon said, looking away. He hadn’t meant to stare but Roderick was just so  _ beautiful.  _ His thick curls shone chestnut as the sun hit them, and his eyes were bluer than the brightest sky. When Gideon saw him, he could feel his heart beat harder. Knowing Roderick, understanding each other the way they were beginning to - knowing his bravery, his kindness, his dedication to not only helping him but helping all the children - only made him want him more.

“Are you really?” Roderick asked, and Gideon hoped he wasn’t imagining the note of disappointment in his voice. He felt his cheeks heat, and looked down to the ground. He could feel Roderick looking at him now, but couldn’t meet his eyes. 

“No.” He admitted lowly. He could feel anxiety biting at him, and tried to breathe slowly so as not to alarm Roderick. He knew he felt … something for Roderick, but he knew he was probably expecting too much to even hope those feelings were reciprocated after all they had been through. “I can … I’m sorry if I …”

“I can hear you overthinking from here.” Roderick remarked, and Gideon finally got up the courage to look at him. His wide, blue,  _ perfect _ eyes were shining with warmth, and his lips curled up into a smile. “I don’t mind, you know.”

“You… you don’t?” Gideon stuttered, and Roderick let out a breath through his nose, shaking his head. 

“Of course not.” Roderick said, going back to watching the sunrise and sipping his tea. Gideon looked sidelong at him, puzzled. He found himself thinking again how hard Moth - the Black Fairy had made his life now, how much his forced isolation had turned him into a fucked-up adult. He was good with books, with magic, with numbers but absolutely  _ abysmal  _ with people. On seeing them, he couldn’t help but feel there was something they intrinsically knew that he didn’t. 

Gideon looked down into his milky tea, trying to put all his thoughts into words, or at least words that wouldn’t scare Roderick off or ruin the tenuous … something that was happening between them. “I don’t remember much from after I fought Xavier.” He started, and he felt Roderick tense next to him. “But I remember being so relieved that you were there,  _ alive _ . I knew I would be safe with you there.”

Roderick watched him, his fingers curling in the blanket around his shoulder. Gideon bit his lip before continuing. “And after I woke up in the hospital, I just wanted you there. At first, I thought it was just because I had thought you were dead for so long, and having you close reminded me that I hadn’t failed so spectacularly.” 

Gideon took a deep breath and looked Roderick in the eye. Roderick looked confused, and he lost his nerve, shaking his head. “I’m sorry, forget I said anything. I’m not making any sen-”

He was cut off by the pressure of Roderick’s lips against his. A spark fizzled between them as Roderick pressed deeper, pulling his bottom lip between his own. His lips were warm and slightly chapped, and Gideon felt Roderick’s arms loop around his shoulders, his fingers moving through the short hairs on the back of his neck. He groaned into the kiss, wishing he could pull Roderick closer.

Their lips separated with a soft ‘pop’, and Roderick watched him cautiously (though his arms didn’t move, Gideon noted with a rush of joy). Gideon tried to say something,  _ anything _ but he couldn’t string words together. Roderick finally said, “Was that okay? I shouldn’t have assumed…”

“Fuck, yes. That was… I didn’t think you … cared for me like that.” Gideon answered, unable to peel his eyes away from Roderick’s heaving chest and red, swollen lips. 

Roderick rolled his eyes. “We’ve been sharing the same bed for almost a month. Did you really think I didn’t care for you?”

“I didn’t want to assume.” Gideon muttered, finally bringing his good hand up between them and cupping Roderick’s chilled cheek. “After everything …”

Roderick didn’t even have to ask what he meant ; Gideon could tell he already knew. Roderick pulled back a little, his hand finding Gideon’s on his cheek and lacing their fingers together. “I’ve told you a dozen times, I don’t blame you.”

“There’s a difference between not blaming me …” Here he stopped, unable to put words to what seemed to exist beyond his wildest dreams. Gideon swallowed thickly, “...and kissing me.”

Roderick smiled, pressing a soft kiss to the palm of his hand. Gideon could feel his cheeks heat, and looked down to his lap and the cups of tea cooling on the patio beside them. This couldn’t be real. This had to be a dream. He was going to wake any minute now, and this was all going to be gone. Roderick, his parents,  _ everything. _

Tears sprung to his eyes before rolling down his face and splashing to the patio between them. Roderick made a soft sound, and Gideon looked away, out to the morning. Their positions were reversed - now Roderick was the one watching him while he tried to avoid eye contact. “I don’t deserve … you shouldn’t care.” He said thickly, and Roderick’s thumb ghosted over his cheek.

Roderick’s hand came under his chin, and Gideon felt his heart lurch as they made hesitant eye contact. His blue eyes were filled with concern and compassion, and he hoped, love. “I do.” He whispered, and his breath hitched in his chest. “I care for you. I think I have since we were children.”

The words were too real, too much of a balm on his weary soul. Gideon pulled his good hand out of Roderick’s grasp and instead tangled it in Roderick’s thick curls, before slotting his lips over his. Roderick hummed, clearly pleased, and Gideon took a deep breath in through his nose.

Even with what he had just heard, some part of him still expected Roderick to pull away and declare this was all some cruel joke. Instead, Roderick pulled him closer, mindful of his broken arm between them, and slid his tongue against the seam of his lips. Gideon could feel one of Roderick’s hands sliding up and down his back, and the other moving through his hair, pulling gently at the strands.

Gideon moved his hand down from Roderick’s thick curls, tracing the line of his jaw with the tips of his fingers. Roderick moaned before pressing somehow closer, running his tongue along the back of his teeth.

Gideon smiled - Roderick was good and kind and brave and so many things he would never do enough to deserve. He cared for him so much, so much he felt it might drown him.

He felt a strange sort of heat flood him as they kissed messily. As they separated with panting breaths, the heat nearly exploded from between them, radiating through the backyard in a wave of multi-hued light.

“What the hell was that?” Roderick asked breathlessly, and Gideon floundered as he tried to find the words. Power and magic were beginning to touch his senses again, coming on so strongly he thought it might overwhelm him. “Gideon?” Roderick pressed, and Gideon took a deep, shaky breath in.

“True love’s kiss.” He whispered, almost afraid of the words as they came out of his mouth. He was happy, so happy, but at the same time still plagued by anxiety. They weren’t ready for this yet - nightmares still woke one or both of them every night, each had become almost overprotective of the other, his own anxiety was running rampant (not that anyone knew that). This -  _ true love _ \- would surely be too much of a strain on their fledgling relationship.

“Wow.” Roderick breathed before smiling, a bright, brilliant thing that almost hurt to look at. “I didn’t know it would feel like that.” 

Gideon chuckled before sobering. “It...it doesn’t bother you?”

“Why would it?” Roderick asked, confused. “Does it bother you?”

Gideon floundered for words. This was a good thing, possibly the best thing that had ever happened to him, and he hoped he wouldn’t stick his foot in his mouth. “No, of course not. I just …”

“Just what?” The younger man asked when he went silent.

“It’s just … a lot. I don’t want to screw things up.” Gideon answered, and Roderick laughed softly.

“It’s just a beginning.” He said, and Gideon smiled shakily. “You’ll probably screw up, but so will I. We have a whole future ahead … at least I hope so.”

Rather than answer with words, Gideon leaned forward, pressing another soft kiss to Roderick’s lips. The other man grinned against his mouth before kissing back. They separated after a moment. Gideon ran a glowing hand down over his cast, feeling his arm twitch as magic knit his bones back together, Roderick watching silently. “So you have your magic back then?” He asked once the golden light faded away and the cast cracked down the middle, allowing him to pull his arm 

“Thanks to you.” Gideon said, stretching his arm this way and that and trying to shake off the stiffness. It still felt a little weak and sore, but that was better than the months of recovery that had been looming before him. “Now I can do this.”

He cupped both sides of Roderick’s face before leaning in to kiss him deeply. Roderick only laughed against his lips before tilting his head to the side. They kissed back and forth, each time their mouths opening a little wider. Roderick let out a satisfied sound, and Gideon echoed it before sliding his hands into Roderick’s hair. Roderick bit gently at his bottom lip in response to an accidental pull on his curls, and Gideon couldn’t help but laugh.

They separated after another moment. He let his forehead fall to Roderick’s, and the other man grinned so brightly it could put the sun to shame. Gideon sat back after a moment, still reveling in everything that had happened - Roderick caring for him, true love’s kiss, getting his magic back. But instead of losing contact entirely, he snatched Roderick’s hand in his own, twining their fingers together. “What has you up anyway?”

Roderick’s smile fell, and he felt his stomach drop a little. “Just thinking about what to do now.” 

Gideon tilted his head, confused, and Roderick looked back out to the yard. He sounded breathless when he continued, “This is the first time I’ve had a future to think about, or at least, a future worth looking forward to. It’s just … it’s a bit overwhelming. So many paths ahead, and I just needed some air, I guess.”

Gideon hummed, not exactly sure what to say. He wasn’t exactly prepared for heart-to-hearts, and he hoped desperately he wouldn’t say the wrong thing. “It is. I get it. What do you want?”

Roderick sighed. “I don’t know yet, but I have to start thinking about it. You don’t need me anymore, and by the end of the month, most of the children in the mansion will be with their true families or at least, in new ones here.”

“I’ll always need you.” Gideon said, and Roderick laughed.

“I appreciate the sentiment, but that’s not quite what I meant. I meant more that you don’t need me around all the time anymore.” His fingers ghosted over Gideon’s freshly-unbroken arm. “I don’t have a family of my own, and while I certainly enjoy sharing yours, I want to be my own person.”

Gideon pressed a kiss to Roderick’s clenching knuckles before saying, “I want you to be happy. Whatever that means.”

Roderick smiled softly, taking a sip of his cooling tea. “That’s always going to include you. I hope you know that.” He yawned widely, and pulled the comforter back up around his shoulders. “It was just too much to think about for a moment, and I needed to get some air. But for now, I’m ready to go back to sleep.”

They walked back in together, dumping the tea in the sink and Gideon’s cast in the trash before going back upstairs and collapsing together into their bed. Rather than the tension and awkward sea of space that had existed between them before, Roderick laid nearly on top of him, pressing a kiss to his shoulder before letting out a deep sigh. Gideon smiled and pulled him closer, murmuring, “I have you. No matter what.”


End file.
